Last night, I watched an old episode of a show that showed the going-away party and departure of a man who was in the military. Aware that they wouldn't see him for a long time - and some of them not at all, due to the danger of their work - it was poignant and the characters took time to say what they would say if they never saw each other again. I was suddenly reminded of Cheryl and as always happens in those unguarded moments, the grief hit me and the tears came.

I'm much more mindful now of the brevity of life, of the possibility that my words to someone could unexpectedly be my last. It makes me more diligent to heal breaches and to resolve issues, to enjoy loved ones while we are together. Almost a year ago - next month, to be exact - I saw Cheryl for the last time. She was at a meeting at our church, a service during the reunion of the grads of our school. I hadn't talked with her for a long time, but she was there that weekend and when she saw me, she came over to talk for a bit. At the end of the service, we were all encouraged to go and pray with each other if we felt led to and as I saw her standing on the other side of the sanctuary, I felt an urgency to do so. I prayed about things that we'd talked about, things that she hoped for, but I also found myself praying things that I didn't understand or at least interpreted a different way at that point. The memory of that prayer both haunts and comforts me, as it feels eerie now in light of what happened to Cheryl, yet the fact that the Lord wanted her to be prayed for ahead of time assures me that the prayer was answered and that He was with her even in that time. It is comforting to me because, in a sense, I was allowed to say goodbye to her. That the last words I spoke to her were in the form of a prayer was appropriate, as Cheryl was a person who loved to pray. We became friends while riding on a bus of the Bible school students going to New York to attend a prayer and fasting event for our nation. Because of her character and the godly fruit of her life, much prayer went forth and these prayers, as well as Meredith's brave fight that prolonged her life until the authorities were there to catch him with the evidence, helped to expose a killer and put him behind bars. Because of them, lives were undoubtedly saved. God didn't desire or cause Cheryl's murder, however, knowing what that individual intended to do, He allowed her to be part of stopping what appears to be a string of murders and to prevent others that would certainly occur. In this sense, I consider Cheryl to be a martyr for Christ. What is obviously horrific to us and unthinkable is, in light of eternity, only the blink of an eye and now Cheryl is with Jesus. She is in complete joy and peace and is surrounded by only love. She isn't pining for thing of the past, but her eyes and heart are fixed on Him and His beauty.

HGTV - thanks for sharing your heartfelt feelings about Cheryl and of the last time the two of you spent time together. Cheryl and Meredith were both such inspiring and beautiful women during their short time on Earth, and they are now enveloped in the light of God.

HGTVfan,

Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful story about Cheryl. I can't even write anything else right now , I'm so touched. I needed to hear your words "to heal breaches and to resolve issues, to enjoy loved ones while we are together" today. Thank you for that too.

HGTV, thanks for sharing. I found your account very meaningful. I am sorry for your loss, as Cheryl sounds like she was quite a woman.

HGTV..this is a beautiful tribute to Cheryl. She would most likely feel that she would not have such an impression on others. I gave the boys each a copy of the poem..I Am Spending Christmas With Jesus Christ This Year! I am not sure of they read it, but it gave me some peace.

I like to feel that Cheryl, Meridith & the Bryants are up there watching over Us!

Today I am wondering if I will get that chance to one last time sing "If we can make it through December" to my best friend. He would sing that to me during all the rough times I have been through in the past to encourage me and give me hope. Unfortunately, I can't give him any hope today, or even the promise of another day here on earth. He is dying.

I don't know what to say anymore. I don't know if I will ever see him again. I never thought I would see this day come so early in our lives. He stood by my bedside when I was in CCU and ICU. But I don't think I can do that for him.

So we need to cling to our memories I suppose, but not back down from life one bit. We only have this one go around don't we?

Tazebell, I don't know all of the details of the situation, but could you send him an audiotape of you singing and talking (maybe a pair of headphones also)? We do this with hospice patients. Just an idea to consider. Feel free to PM me if you want to discuss further or want suggested readings.

Tazebell check your PM. Time waits for no one. As you know, not everyone has the chance to say goodbye. Do what you can while you can, not everyone is able to do the same things. Closure will be therapeutic as you share your memories.

Tazebell your story made the tears flow..Perhaps It was because my other half left last week to do Storm Restoration in Huston, Texas.He could be gone for 2 months or more...I would really appreciate any Thoughts & Prayers from each of you.

Tazbell you could also get a friend to digitally video your song for your friend. My digital camera has a video feed & then all you have to do is connect the USB cable & plug the other end into the Yellow, White or Red outlets on the front of a Television. I bet he would really like that! Just an idea.

Hi MustangSally. I'm sending thoughts and prayers to you. Your cry time is up for tonight, it's time for you to go watch something funny (it's the best I could do at the moment). I know your little pink friend is there for you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afi2xeM5ZSI&feature=related

well, folks, my bestest friend lost his fight around 10 this morning. I never got to sing that Merle Haggard song to him. Funny thing is, in this small town, by the time I got word news of his death had already spread. I called the parents of two of our closest friends, and they already had heard!! I asked how they could have known pretty much before I did, and it seems between his first wife and another lawyer in town (who happens to be the brother of one of our gang whoses grandmother is in the same nusing home as bud's aunt) the phone lines were buzzing. Welcome to town talk, I kid you not.

I can't imagine what they must say about me! Anyway my bud will be cremated and a service at the end of the week. They have to hold off so state officials and legislators can come in.

He was a good guy. What a loss for this world. I have cried and cried until I can't anymore. His sister told me to put on a happy face when I went to see his dad. He buried his wife 19 years ago, just six weeks or so after she had gone into the hospital and was diagnosed with cancer. But my bud did all the right things - even his dad said he didn't even eat meat, let alone smoke or do drugs. (he did toss back a few light beers with us). He ran all the time (jog). He was also a workaholic but he had fun - always taking exotic vacations and doing stuff like driving a race car or jumping out of airplanes. He said Aruba was the prettiest place he had ever been. He took his two girls on great trips and never brought me a dang tshirt ever !! I will so miss him. Who am I going to call now when life slams me with another problem?

Thanks for listening.

Tazebell..This bud was one lucky guy to have YOU for a friend..I feel your pain bouncing off your written words! Maybe you will gain strength in writing down your deepest feelings for your friend...I have found that this works for me. He will definitely hold a special place in your heart and soul forever!

My other advise is to let the tears flow..Sometimes that too, is a great coping mechanism. I guess that is why we have those pesty little tear ducts! At times, those tears are the best mental cleansing things around! Too bad men do not put them to use more often!

Keep Faith, Family & Friends Close to your Heart! These are the ties that bind us even in our darkest times!

Daffodil has resolved the posting problems.

It's a very difficult day for me today, the anniversary of the day Cheryl was abducted. May God's justice prevail and may His grace fill the hearts of her sons, daughter-in-law, granddaughters, other family, church family and friends today.